Kim Kardashian, Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge (Credit: AP/Chris Pizzello/Reuters/Paul Lewis)
We live in an era of baby-bump obsession — duh.
But following the much-hyped births of Prince George and North West, it’s still easy to feel a little postpartum depressed. If you’re like me, you want to cry about the way celebrity tabloids can make nine months feel like nine years. You feel intensely irritable that people don’t know the difference between Miley Cyrus and Syria, but even the least interested among us can’t help knowing Prince George’s swaddle was aden + anais and Duchess Kate’s post-maternity dress was made by Jenny Packham.
I’m here to say that this hopeless feeling is normal. It’s OK to want to shake your remote the next time you flick past a roundtable discussion of Duchess Kate’s postnatal bump. You’re not the only one who wants to throw your iPhone at the wall when confronted with a headline about whether the future monarch will be circumcised.
If it’s any consolation, it will all be over soon. America, ever the narcissistic mother, prefers baby bumps to children and expectant mothers to full-fledged bum-and-nose-wiping ones.
Yes, culturally speaking, we are obsessed with the celebrity unborn. But our well-wishing turns to nitpicking minutes after a woman’s feet leave the stirrups and our (I mean her) little bundle assumes an identity of his or her own. So it’s T-minus 10, really, until Kate and the royal prince are subjected to the one-size-fits-all injunctions of the mommy wars.
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